andsuddenlydynamite | (no subject)

The hair-ruffle annoys Ryuutaro beyond belief. Just who did this guy think he was, ruining his hairstyle like that?
And, yes, he was special, thanks for noticing and yes, Hayato could be quite annoying. But Shamal wasn't allowed to say that. He just wasn't allowed to talk badly about Ryuutaro's boyfriend.

"I am aware that he's rushing things a bit from time to time, but you shouldn't say it like that", Ryuutaro smirked, "It can be very easy to get along with him."
For him himself at least.

Shamal just chuckles.

"Well, he's not as bad as he used to be. You should have seen him as a kid. Kept running into the middle of everything waving around dynamite without a clue how to use it. I'm surprised he made it out with all his limbs, never mind fingers."

Which is some minor fishing about the strange scar he found on Hayato's leg. Even if the boy doesn't say anything outright, his reaction to the question should give him enough of a reason to pester Hayato about it later.

As a kid... Ryuutaro remembered all-too-well how Hayato was when he was really small. That cute kid who loved being carried and would hide his face in his pants. That little boy who had yet to learn about the cruelty of the world.
But Ryuutaro could only imagine too well what happened afterwards.

At the mention of limbs he twitches, another memory floating back in his mind. One that he'd rather forget about. But he forced the smile to stay on his face. He was sure Hayato wouldn't appreciate if he told people about that. But he holds his boyfriend just a bit tighter.

"Yes, that is kind of amazing."

That was all the reaction Shamal needed, he would drop the subject for now and bring it up in private with Hayato later, when he was better. For now a strategic change of subject. The teen of course just snuggled into Ryuutaro's neck a bit more, when the grip around him tightens a bit.

"You know, back in Italy, he would always pretend to be hurt so he could come see me and swipe the dynamite out of my coat."

Yup, Shamal here is the one that got Hayato hooked up with dynamite. He chuckles a bit.

"He's a good kid. Take care of him, alright? I'd hate to see him fall back to the way he used to be."

"I wasn't intending to let that happen. I will take care of Hayato", he said steadily, "That's the fate that was decided."
Ryuutaro smiled a small, but very confident smile, which got brighter (and more fake) again when he reached the end of his words.
It always felt good to mention destiny. It was a habit he'd almost been forced to half-way give up on during his time in the Manor. (It was an odd thing how the Manor had taken so many things he loved away from him, but almost completely made up for it by giving him Hayato.)

And he gives Ryuutaro a pat on the shoulder before he gets up to leave.

"Get some rest kiddo."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And in about a week, Hayato had made a rapid recovery, as had Yamamoto... and FINALLY both were given the okay to get out of bed... well officially. Hayato had been out of bed pretty much from the moment he woke up, but he had been good about staying with Ryuutaro in the library. He rather enjoyed their little hideaway. It was filled with reading and research material, spacious enough to work on his dynamite, and private enough to spend some... erm... quality intimate time with his boyfriend (hey, two weeks without his boyfriend... the MOMENT everything stopped hurting when he moved he jumped Ryuutaro so fast....) and now Hayato and Ryuutaro were comfortably in the kitchen eating breakfast.

Ryuutaro had been... adapting. Trying to fit in by making his presence seem as if it was only natural for him to be here. Even though he sometimes just didn't understand a thing, he'd try to pretend he knew what was going on.
He still didn't like this world, but over the days it became endurable.
It wasn't that different from the Manor, if he came to think of it. Just that the people here all knew each other in contrary to be randomly mixed together.
But the longer Ryuutaro stayed the more he knew as well, so everything was getting better.

This morning the fortune-teller was actually kind of content.
"Over a week has passed. Looks like we're staying here a little longer."
Or the weird case of him actually getting stuck in Hayato's world had become reality.

It had worked well, Ryuutaro fit right in. the girl's had taken a shine to Ryuutaro, they found he was adorable and sweet... and what girl wouldn't squeal over a fortune-teller? Tsuna had meekly tried to make Ryuutaro feel more welcome, but ended up somehow getting weirded out or intimidated by Ryuutaro and just backed away and watched from the sidelines. Yamamoto was in the hospital, and had yet to meet him... and Lambo... well... Lambo was Lambo. He pissed off Gokudera which resulted in people having to hold the teen back to keep him from playing a game of 'kick the baby'. Hibari, of course, made himself scarce, and Bianchi would look out for the two boys... while occasionally trolling Gokudera with her face.

Hayato smiled brightly... but at the same time he also looked a bit worried.

"I haven't seen the blackberries at all... and I've been here for three weeks now... Ryuutaro... I think that this time... that maybe... we're here together."

And he reaches out to hold one of Ryuutaro's hands in both of his. He was happy... but afraid how Ryuutaro would handle not being able to go to his own home world again. He knew how important beyblading was to Ryuutaro... and being stuck in a world he didn't understand. Not to mention they had been stuck in the underground fortress... if they went above ground then they would be hunted down. Though Hayato had a plan to get Ryuutaro 'outside' for a little while.

Ryuutaro's head snapped up at that, but then he just nodded slowly.
"I've already thought of that myself...."
And he wasn't sure how he felt about it. He wasn't even sure if he was ready to comprehend it. After years at the Manor the thought of many worlds had become natural, as well had traveling around between them. But to stay in a world that wasn't his own? Stay for years, if not forever? Ryuutaro couldn't fully wrap his head around it.
During his time in the Manor he'd always expected to be returned home sometime... At first he'd been waiting for it and later he'd started to fear it.

And now he was here. And it certainly seemed like he was staying. Ryuutaro thought of all the things he wouldn't see again. At least there were no people who he'd miss too much.
He had lived without his parents forever now and he was fine with it. And his parents would be fine without him. Even if... Ryuutaro paused in his previous thoughts. If he remained at Hayato's world, that supposedly meant time in his world would start passing again - without him. He'd be missing. That would put his father to a whole new form of worry, but it was not like he could do anything about it.
The people from his world weren't the problem in the end. Even if Ryuutaro felt a bit weird about not knowing about how his world would develop.

But this was a still a world without Beyblading. He'd never find an opponent from his world again. Even if he'd get people here to try it out, he doubted that there would be a real blader among them.

Looking back, Ryuutaro had spent all his life trying to become better at blading. Up to the top, to become the very best. Just like everyone else had done.

It'd be just him and his partner here. Nobody else. In a way he was world's best blader now.
What a lonely thought.
'Beyblading is the ultimate collision of two fighting spirits!'
Lonely...
'The future of Beyblading... I entrust it to you'
... and sad.

Ryuutaro forced himself to stop this train of thought.
He was here, this was fate - it just had to be.
And he was with the person he loved, the only person in all words who he truly desired to stay with.
If he remained here that meant he and Hayato weren't going to get separated. He didn't need to leave him, he could keep all the promises he'd made.

After what seemed like eternity Ryuutaro looked his boyfriend in the eyes again and smiled.
"If that's true, it's a very good thing."

An eternity that nearly killed Hayato. Did he not want to be here? Hayato could understand... to just forsake the world you came from and everything you knew all for the sake of one person... it was a bit much. And Hayato obviously didn't hold himself high on the value chart, while he had gotten better- much better- that constant doubt was something too ingrained in him to ever let up completely.

Hence the tightened grip on Ryuutaro's hand and the sad almost apologetic smile on his face. It was his fault Ryuutaro was stuck here. Ryuutaro always said he had found his place in the world... and now that was taken away because of him. He takes a deep breath...

"Ryuutaro...."

He looks away, off to the side. He didn't want Ryuutaro to see how much proposing this would affect him.

"I'm sure that... if you want to go back to your world... I bet that we could..."

He had to pause to swallow the lump in his throat before he continued, and the hands holding Ryuutaro's began to tremble.

"we could find a way... if it would make you happy... I'll... I'll understand."

In the end that was what was most important. He couldn't be selfish. That didn't stop the sinking feeling in his chest at thinking about moving on without Ryuutaro. He didn't know how he would... but if Ryuutaro was happy... and smiling... even if it was somewhere else far away from him, he loved him enough to let him go. Even if it broke his heart.

Ryuutaro's eyes widened.
A part of him was screaming that he hated this world, that he wanted to go home so badly, return to his peaceful life without bloodshed without the fear that would be haunting him at every day he spent in this place.
He wanted to go back to his life, to the place where he could be who he wanted.

But that was only a part of him. The other part knew just how impossible it would be to leave Hayato after all this. He wouldn't be able to move on. Being at home would only feel like a shallow peace, tasting of cowardice.
It wouldn't feel alright. Not at all.

Ryuutaro took his hands out of Hayato's shaking ones, carefully brushing over them before he reached out to make the other boy look at him.

"You're offering that I can break all my promises and abandon my fate?"
He shook his head.
"That's a silly thought."
Even if he'd lie when he'd say he really wanted to stay, even if he'd lie when saying he wasn't scared... He wouldn't just take back those years now, pretend that they were nothing. He couldn't, he wouldn't.
He'd adapt. He wouldn't be himself if he couldn't be fantastic everywhere. He'd adapt. He'd learn. He'd grow stronger. Get better.

"There are promises that are worth being kept."

And Gokudera hesitantly looked up at him, revealing his watering eyes.... but at Ryuutaro's words he seems to calm down. He knew Ryuutaro wasn't happy though. They really had almost become two halves of the same person. Hayato knew when something was wrong with Ryuutaro... heck he was almost able to get into Ryuutaro's thought process at this point. Obviously he couldn't figure out everything... but he could tell when Ryuutaro was upset or unhappy. Like now.

It was driving Hayato just as crazy as Ryuutaro. This world scared him, the lives of everyone he cared for was in danger, but he couldn't look weak. He needed to be strong for everyone. To pretend nothing was wrong with him so he could take on the burdens of both the Vongola and Ryuutaro... that was his intent... but the wall was cracking. Usually when there was something wrong with the environment he could fall back on Ryuutaro, or if there was something wrong with Ryuutaro he had some sort of a safety net to stabilize himself with.

"R-Ryuutaro..."

He stands up from the table and wraps his arms around his boyfriend, pulling him into a tight hug. He would push this all back further. He couldn't break on Ryuutaro now. No, he needed to be his lover's assurance that everything would turn out right... because this was supposedly 'his world'.

"I promise things will get better. We'll fix it... and go back to the past... and everything will be alright."

He pulls Ryuutaro's face into his shirt, so his boyfriend couldn't see his barrier faltering.

"I'll get stronger. What happened with Gamma won't happen again, I swear."

He bites his lip... he couldn't help it... he had to fall apart just a little...

"And.. and when we get back... I can show you my apartment... and maybe I can try to build you a new carriage... so please... please just smile again... like you did before we came here..."

If Ryuutaro could just smile... then he could be stronger... just to find enough strength to keep going for as long as it took...

Edited 2011-08-27 19:59 (UTC)

Ryuutaro pressed his face against Hayato's chest so tightly he could hardly breathe anymore. His hands reached around to hug his boyfriend back and his fingers grabbed the fabric of his clothes tightly.
For another moment he was silent, but this time it was shorter.
"I will...", he then whispered against Hayato's shirt, "Just... give me a moment..."
He wasn't going to get home ever again. He wasn't going to participate in a tournament again. He wasn't going to see what became of Ginga. He wasn't going to see kids blade next to the street anymore. He wasn't going to be able to say 'Go Shoot' together with someone again.
He wasn't going to return home anymore. He was an alien now, living his life as one.
Ryuutaro was scared, even though he didn't want to be. He didn't want all this to affect him so much, but it was just crashing down on him, making him unable to breathe.

After a while his hands finally relaxed and the tenseness left his body mostly. He wasn't desperately pressing himself against Hayato anymore and merely leaned against him now.
"Don't worry... "

Hayato reciprocated that tight hug. He needed to be Ryuutaro's pillar. Feeling his boyfriend so desperately cling to him made him realize that he couldn't break too. He would bury his fears and his insecurities again, so that he could accept Ryuutaro's. It would be selfish if he didn't. Ryuutaro needed him more then anything right now, he wasn't allowed to be weak.

"Take all the time you need. I'm not goin' anywhere."

Even when Ryuutaro's grip loosened, Gokudera didn't let go. Right now he would be Ryuutaro's strength. He moves one hand to the back of Ryuutaro's head and just starts petting his hair.

"I love you."

Ryuutaro was in pain. A lot of it. And it was his fault. How much happier would he be if they had just stayed friends and he went home to his world instead of getting together and ending up here? It hurt to think like this, absolutely broke his heart, but how much better off would Ryuutaro have been without him?

"I'm so sorry Ryuutaro."

Whether he's implying this is his fault, or saying it in consolation is unclear by his tone.

"I love you, too."
For what other reason would he be doing this? Abandon his life, all he had for just one person?
Ryuutaro lets himself be petted, closing his eyes. It would be fine... He just needed this moment to convince himself of that.
But at the apology he opened his eyes and looked up at Hayato's face.

"Don't. This is my decision. Don't say you're sorry" - not even if it was just consolation. Ryuutaro didn't want to hear it. He had given Hayato his everything, the least his boyfriend could do now was accept it properly.
"I'm not doing this because anything forces me to. I'm doing this because I want to."

Hayato looked surprised for a moment, but then solemnly nodded. He cups Ryuutaro's cheek, stroking the soft skin with his thumb.

"I'll do everything I can to fix this whole mess alright? Once we get home... things will be better."

At this point he would be willing to agree to just about anything to brighten Ryuutaro's mood, even just a little. The fact that Ryuutaro was putting himself through all of this.. just for his sake... he didn't know how to take it. For Ryuutaro give up everything for him... he felt like that made it his job to just fix all his pain. To make going through this all worth his while, but he couldn't think of any way to do that. The only thing he felt he could do to help was to hold Ryuutaro. Hold him and be there for him as long as he needed.

"Do you want to lay down for a bit?" Then there's a weak, worried little smile, "I found a place I think you'd really like."

Ryuutaro didn't actually know what he wanted, but he supposed that laying down might help him figure it out.
Though it was not like he had a lot to think through. Contemplating on what he'd lost again and again wouldn't do him any good.
He needed to look ahead, figure out what to do with his life at this place.
It couldn't be so bad. He was a traveler. And another world was about the farthest you could travel, so he shouldn't complain.

The boy smiled a bit and nodded.
"I'd like that."

Hayato took Hayato's chin in his hand and gave him a gentle kiss. He was here for him. And he always would be. He would make sure everything was alright.

He separates and takes Ryuutaro's hand in his, leading him off down the halls. Once he gets to a certain point, he starts looking around to make sure no one saw him... and slipped through a few rather hidden hallways, which eventually lead to a very secluded Japanese style abode, complete with a traditional Japanese garden. They may be under ground, but through some large mesh vents high up on the ceiling there's a nice crisp breeze coming in. Hayato peeks through a few of the doors, luckily Hibari was nowhere to be found.

Hayato leads his boyfriend to the porch over looking the garden, and sits down, pulling Ryuutaro next to him. He hoped this would make him feel better, from what he saw, Traditional Japan in both worlds looked mostly the same.

The moment they arrived at their destination Ryuutaro instantly seemed to relax a bit. Naturally this was right up his alley. It was strange how a sense of familiarity could calm him down, even though he usually liked to see new places.
The fortune-teller gladly leaned against Hayato, smiling a bit.
"You're absolutely right, this place is beautiful."
As if that was much of a surprise.

And there it was, his smile again. Hayato's own tenseness fades a little, and a little smile spreads across his own face. He wouldn't tell Ryuutaro any of his own worries and burdens... but he would still look to the other boy for strength in ways Ryuutaro probably wasn't aware he was giving.

Hayato leans his head on top of Ryuutaro's starts rubbing his back.

"I thought you would like it."

Ryuutaro said nothing anymore, just staying like this was completely fine with him. The fortune-teller allowed his thoughts to wander into nothingness away from all the worries he had.
It was something he was good at. Freeing your mind was essential to fortune-telling after all.

And now that it was open, there was room for something else to go through.
The only thing Ryuutaro could think before his world went white was 'I don't believe it'.
He had become so used to visions occuring extremely rare or not at all, it was so surprising to suddenly feel himself sucked into the world of the future.

For Hayato it had to feel like Ryuutaro was freezing, his entire body becoming tense and his eyes widening, not looking at anything particular.

Hayato could feel his boyfriend tense up. A bit worried he wraps his arm around the boy's shoulder, and tries to follow his gaze to see what he looked so alarmed about... but there was nothing.

"O-oi... Ryuutaro?"

He placed a hand worriedly on Ryuutaro's cheek and looked him over, he was breathing alright. What if it was his heart?! What if he was sick or something? He moved his hand to check Ryuutaro's pulse, his heartbeat was fine... he honestly didn't know what was happening, and it scared him. What if bringing Ryuutaro here made him sick? What if he was going to...?

"H-hey C-c'mon snap out of it!"

He grasps Ryuutaro's shoulders and shakes him a little.

After just another moment the life returned into Ryuutaro's eyes. He gasped for breath shortly, but his breathing stabilized soon after.

He looked up at Hayato and instead of what he'd seen there was one thought pushing itself in front of that.
So easy, it was so easy, so easy to see again.
If this was it, if he was to stay here, did the Author... did she give him back what she had taken?
Could he finally.. finally... be complete again?

"I... ", he started, almost not daring to say it out loud, "I... This... I'm so glad."
He'd start analyzing the vision once he had actually brought himself to believe it.

Hayato just held him there, so clueless as to what was going on... but he was happy? Hayato in his relief just wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and let his face flop on onto Ryuutaro's shoulder.

"oh god you scared the shit outta me...." He looks up again, "I though you were havin' a heart attack or somethin'..."

Ryuutaro was amazed at just how much Hayato had worried. Actually he didn't know what it looked like for the outside world in those moments he traveled to the future. He remembered a few occasions on which it had happened in front of other people, but nobody had ever really told him what it was like. Some people had been more worried, some less, it depended on the length of the vision, too.

Ryuutaro reached out to brush through Hayato's hair, but not the thought of what he just unintentionally send his boyfriend through could stop him from feeling excited.

"You should get used to that", he said quietly, "If... if she's... really given it back to me, this should happen a bit more often."

Yush >D

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TIMESKIP TEIMS~

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Would Ryuutaro like to have a vision~?!

NATURALLY HE DOES; HOW CAN YOU EVEN ASK? XD Also, lol, novel tag

\o/ pulls things together for vision references~

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