andsuddenlydynamite | (no subject)

Looking at those letters felt a bit strange to Ryuutaro as well. He didn't know a lot about the past, obviously he was one for looking ahead, but every single line just seemed angry to him. He imagined Hayato's hands carving it, the way they'd looked back then.

For a moment he lost himself into his imagination of what the past might have been like, then he turned his head to the Hayato of the present.

"I can imagine...", he smiled softly. Maybe it was a slight bit, like when they passed the places he'd been at after leaving home on their visit there.

Hayato stares silently at the name carved into the stone, and absentmindedly gives his boyfriend's hand a little squeeze, just to remind himself of just how far he had come.

He took a deep breath, and leaned his head on Ryuutaro's, nuzzling it for a moment, and kissing his forehead, as a silent 'thank you for loving me'. Since after all, without Ryuutaro's companionship throughout all that tumultuous time at the manor, will so many people close to him coming and going, he would have no doubt slipped back into the way he was. Angry. Alone. Nothing to work towards, and utterly powerless in a world where he could do nothing about what happened to him.

"Let's get outta here..."

Hayato had really gone a long way. Ryuutaro's grip on Hayato's hand tightened for a small moment before he replied, allowing this moment of remembering and imagining the past to pass.

"As you wish", he smiled. Because really, here in Italy he'd basically go everywhere Hayato wanted, there wasn't much else to do.

Hayato pulls Ryuutaro back up to the bridge, and starts walking down the road. They walk past the main port with has a large ship with a number of people loading cars and luggage and things generally bustling by. There seems to be more security around then would be normal for such a humble port.

Hayato paused and steps behind Ryuutaro to turn him by the shoulders to face the port. The teen reaches over his boyfriend's shoulder to point to the ship.

"See that boat right there? It'll take you right to Sicily. See all those people in the suits runnin' around? They're tryin' to make sure nothin' illegal get's smuggled in. Ten Euro says half of 'em are dirty."

Ryuutaro gave all those people some careful and skeptical looks.

"They sure don't seem trustworthy", he commented casually.

That Ryuutaro thought so might also just result in the fact that they were strangers and western. While Ryuutaro wasn't paranoid or hating foreigners, there were just very high chances that he just simply wouldn't feel anything positive towards adult, western strangers.

Hayato just laughed, he didn't trust them either.

"Never trust anyone from Sicily. They're all slimeballs and scumbags always lookin' to save their own asses and make a buck."

He wrapped his arms around Ryuutaro and watched the ship for a while. How strange it would be to see Sicily again? Would people recognize him? Was this even his Sicily? Or some Author perversion? Hayato heaved out a sigh as he absentmindedly watched, musing about the place he grew up in...

Ryuutaro shortly raised his eyebrow, a silent version of 'you're from sicily' and then chuckled.

"I'm sure you remember, that I do not trust people in general?"

But Ryuutaro could feel what Hayato was thinking and he contemplated asking him to go there... Hayato made Ryuutaro go back to the place he grew up in, it would be only fair. But their backgrounds where just a bit too different...

Hayato laughed a little, "Hey, they're a real convincing lot of scumbags."

And he gives Ryuutaro a peck on the cheek, before starting to move away. It was a stupid train of thought. Why the hell would he ever want to go back to Sicily? It's not like he had anything he was attached to there. Ryuutaro probably wouldn't like it either.

Convincing enough or not, Ryuutaro would be damned if he ever put any kind of trust in the wrong adults again. The past had taught him a lot better than that. Ryuutaro chose to not deepen this subject, living in the past wasn't his kind of thing.

"... is Sicily like here?", he asked casually. If anything, he at least wanted to imagine that place.

He let out another chuckle, "Sorta, it's a bit poorer, a lot of run down buildings, with a few really fancy estates like my old man's. Lot of stray animals too."

Stray animals... he supposed he was kind of a stray himself.

"In the summer it gets real hot, enough to drive you mad if you don't go swimmin' or somethin'. But it's spring now, so it's pretty cool, and there's a lot of rain. Lots of flowers bloom this time of year though. Farmers are harvesting oranges and olives and stuff. It's pretty nice.... if you're not dealin' with the people."

He took a deep breath and let out a sigh. It was strange to reminisce about it. It was so familiar to him, but also so very not. He had felt alienated in his own home, but he knew it like the back of his hand.

"Lot of the shops close down in the winter once the tourists are gone, but a few mom-and-pop shops are probably open. But it's pretty quiet this time of year..."

"That indeed sounds pretty nice... if you ignore the people, like you said."
For Ryuutaro that was even natural. Ignoring people was what he did. Even if he talked to them, he generally ignored the deeper meanings of their words. Or just denying the fact that they might have something to say in first place. It was a small miracle how someone like Ryuutaro even managed surviving in a business that should include sensitive talking to people.

And what Hayato said about the place Sicily in general, did really sound good to Ryuutaro. Except for the heat-part, but it wasn't summer.

"Yeah, I guess it is... haven't seen it since I was twelve though..."

He scratched his head a bit, "Well I guess four years ain't that long... but it feels like it's been ages..."

He had changed so much in those four years, Ryuutaro didn't even know just how much he had changed. Ryuutaro had never seen him when he was in the streets, and for that he was grateful. With all the Author's plots it was always a terrifying possibility. Even just a few months prior and Ryuutaro would have met him before he even considered his own life as something worthwhile enough to live for.

"I wonder what it's like now..."

"I know what you mean..."

It had also just been 4 years of him not being in Kyouto when they'd visited his home. And he'd felt like he'd been gone for centuries.. and at the same time like it hadn't been more than a single day.

Ryuutaro feels a growing urge to ask Hayato to go back there... But then he just has to think of his father, of fishing trips and the likes, and it honestly didn't feel like a very good idea anymore.

Hayato's eyes lingered on the boat, there was a part of him that wanted to back, to reminisce on the place he grew up. But that was stupid... but... there was one place in Sicily that he had felt safe, while it wasn't the main Vongola headquarters...

"I wonder if the Ninth's estate is there..."

He shook the thought away, and reluctantly started walking away from the boatyard, taking a few last glances.

"Come on, let's go."

Even if Hayato didn't seem convinced himself, Ryuutaro decided to follow him. His background was something different from Ryuutaro's, he wouldn't just ask to go there.

"The Ninth's estate?", he asked instead, hoping to get some more details on Hayato's past once again.

He smiled and nodded, "Yeah, the Ninth is the current head of the Vongola, he's the one who pulled me off the street."

He laughed a little, "If it wasn't for the Ninth I would have taken a bullet to my head."

And he paused, letting out a thoughtful sigh as he remembered the whole experience.

"I owe him a lot..."

After all, if it weren't for the Ninth he would most likely be dead... and if not dead he would still be on the streets... and he would have never met Ryuutaro. Even if the manor had pulled him away after he had been on the streets, he would have been such a little monster. Ryuutaro would have never bothered to waste his time on a thing like that...

"You were really fortunate to have met him..."

And thinking about it, Ryuutaro was also fortunate that Hayato had met him.
It was odd to think about what might have been, even only briefly.
Ryuutaro had lived under the assumption that everything happening was fate and could not have possibly happened any other way. It was an easy way, as he now realized. And maybe things weren't just quite as easy. Maybe. He'd need time to think all that over properly. And that time was just not now.

"If I didn't... and we met, we probably wouldn't have gotten together... I mean assumin' I lived that long."

He shook that thought away, "Y'now the first time I met the Ninth he actually kinda tricked me into playin' piano for someone while they were hurt."

And he paused thoughtfully for a moment.

"So I guess I have my mom to thank for that too..."

If his mother hadn't taught him the piano, then he wouldn't have been able to take over for Marco, the Ninth wouldn't have taken him in, he would never have joined the Vongola... and possibly he would have never met Ryuutaro. He owed her for everything good in his life, he really did.

and then it dawned on him... his mother's grave was probably in Sicily... if there was ever a time when he could find out where she was buried...

The piano. In the end it always seemed to be coming down to that.
Ryuutaro couldn't help but notice how Hayato fell quiet after mentioning his mother. Not that it was unusual.

"What are you thinking?", he asked. If Hayato didn't want to say it he could still answer something ~~like 'I wondered if green socks get lost easier in the washing machine'~~ random... It was an open enough question after all.

Like Hayato would never fib to his boyfriend ~~about anything not including his own personal well being~~. He's silent for another moment as he dwells on the matter a bit.

"....She's over there... and I... I know her name now..."

Then he just shakes his head. Ryuutaro wouldn't be happy there. It wasn't worth that. e casually just starts walking again.

"ah... just forget about it..."

"Why?", Ryuutaro tilted his head.

He was genuinely curious about the reason. What Hayato had said there made a lot of sense.
So what was the reason? Ryuutaro could imagine that it was the thought of his mother's grave alone, but then again... It was some kind of a chance again, even though a rather sad one.

He paused walking again, a blush spreading across his cheeks, "I... I never got to find out where she was buried... I guess it's the closest thing I'll ever get to seeing her."

He looked down. God he was so depressing.

"But forget about it. You... really wouldn't like Sicily...."

So what now? Ryuutaro himself was the reason or at least the excuse made? He couldn't help but think that it was slightly ridiculous. Princess-treatment or not, he could still deal with unpleasant stuff very well.

He huffed slightly. "If it's about that, I can assure you I'm very much capable of dealing with places I dislike."

On travels he couldn't expect only the nice places to turn up, not too mention Manor experiences...

He was getting to caught up in this. It probably was more an excuse than anything anyway.

He blushed and looked off to the side rubbing the back of his neck. To him Ryuutaro's happiness took priority over any personal matters, the same went for the Tenth. Heck, he would cut off his own arm for either Ryuutaro or his boss if it would make them happy.

"B-but I don't want to make you unhappy..."

That was when it was time for another fan-shush.

"I'm sorry, I missed the point where you became me and could know for sure what would make me unhappy", he smiled, "While yes, you know me extremely well, I'm still sure it won't be half as bad as you try to make it."

He took the fan back and sighed a bit.

"If you want to go, I'm going with you. It's simple as that."