He took a deep breath. He wouldn't go into detail about everything that happened unless Ryuutaro asked.
"When I first ran away... for about the first week or so I hoped my father would come find me, and tell me everything I heard was wrong... even if I knew he was lying, I just wanted him to come back. After that week, I thought that maybe he just couldn't find me, so I tried harder to be more noticeable. Started stealing food from markets, got caught, picked fights. After a few months I finally realized that he wasn't gonna come. Then something sorta changes, I started taking more serious jobs, stealing motorcycles, cars, breaking into safes. Pulling hits, and... I saw a lot of shit... and I did a lot of shit, real bad shit. After that... I was just... different. It's hard to explain... but I just wasn't the same after that. I didn't care if what I did was wrong... nothing fazed me at all... I was... just numb to everything... I just got so used to everything."
He looks up at Ryuutaro, "If the same thing happens to you... and you change like I did... if your smile changes... I'll never be able to live with myself. You don't smile the same after you've become so desensitized to everything. This world isn't always so bad Ryuutaro... just give me a little time to fix it."
He hoped Ryuutaro would understand what he was talking about. He had seen him as child... he knew he was just so vastly different from that little boy with with big bright smile.
no subject
"When I first ran away... for about the first week or so I hoped my father would come find me, and tell me everything I heard was wrong... even if I knew he was lying, I just wanted him to come back. After that week, I thought that maybe he just couldn't find me, so I tried harder to be more noticeable. Started stealing food from markets, got caught, picked fights. After a few months I finally realized that he wasn't gonna come. Then something sorta changes, I started taking more serious jobs, stealing motorcycles, cars, breaking into safes. Pulling hits, and... I saw a lot of shit... and I did a lot of shit, real bad shit. After that... I was just... different. It's hard to explain... but I just wasn't the same after that. I didn't care if what I did was wrong... nothing fazed me at all... I was... just numb to everything... I just got so used to everything."
He looks up at Ryuutaro, "If the same thing happens to you... and you change like I did... if your smile changes... I'll never be able to live with myself. You don't smile the same after you've become so desensitized to everything. This world isn't always so bad Ryuutaro... just give me a little time to fix it."
He hoped Ryuutaro would understand what he was talking about. He had seen him as child... he knew he was just so vastly different from that little boy with with big bright smile.