Hayato reached up to fling his arms around his boyfriend, ignoring the IV in his amr, and just clung to him with everything he had. He buried his face into Ryuutaro’s shoulder surrounding himself with the warmth from his body, his scent, the feel of his clothes, trying to lose himself in the embrace from his lover. He didn’t want anything else to exist. He just wanted to hide like this forever, where he could never be hurt again… or at least until Ryuutaro learned to hate him too and threw him away. He let out another burst of sobs at Ryuutaro’s words. Empty promises… but…he wanted to believe it so badly. He knew Ryuutaro was trying. Hayato shook his head.

“It can’t… it’s always going to hurt… It… it’s never stopped hurting…” There were moments when he could push the pain away for a little while and just be happy. Like when he was with the Vongola, or Ryuutaro… sometimes he just felt so happy he got hopeful that the pain would never come back… like after he and Ryuutaro made love… he was so happy, he didn’t think anything could hurt him anymore. Now this. He could never be happy, he just wasn’t worth it. He was just damaged goods. A broken boy who would always be unwanted and thrown away.